Welcome to the Unhinged Christmas Blanket CAL!
I decided (very last minute) to put together an interlocking crochet Christmas blanket full of the kind of holiday cheer your conservative Christian parents definitely won’t approve of.

Content Warning:
This CAL will include adult humor, irreverent themes, profanity, sexual innuendo and Rated-R holiday nonsense.

If you want a wholesome Hallmark-movie blanket, this is not that.
If you want to laugh, this is absolutely that.

Using a 5 mm hook and worsted weight yarn, the final blanket will be approximately 5 ft by 5 ft.

This listing is for the December 7, 2025 square:
“I <3 Snow but Fuck ICE”

This square is available for free! I do not feel comfortable ethically charging for it. If you are interested in other squares please check out my shop, or consider buying the Unhinged Christmas Blanket CAL for more patterns at a steep discount!

New squares release daily between December 1–25 around 5ish PM CST, or maybe earlier (I know previously I said before 5, but life happens…)

If you purchase the complete CAL:

Optional joining instructions will be added on December 25

Bonus squares only available in the CAL!

If you have a sense of humor (or want to piss off your relatives),
you’re in the right place.